Here are a couple samples of important conversations that you're missing out on while you're probably talking about irrelevant things like "human trafficking" and "global issues."
Kristen (via text): "I think I've deciphered from your voicemail that you're my brother, that I don't have to listen to Ben, it's too late (?) and you miss Chris. Not sure what all that means, but I appreciate your call."
Ted: "Us destroying our bodies is the only way the Lions will ever win!"
Me: "I just threw up."
Ted: "It is our burden. The white man's burden."
Me: "I love you, bud!"
Ben: "Stop calling me 'bud.'"
No way are you having such deep and meaningful conversations in Belize.
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